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Butterfly Effect

I had forgotten how cool it is to swim in a lake or river after the show. We had a huge hometown gang visiting the show in Vienna and after they all had emptied a couple of glasses at the backstage, I took a van with a small swimming squat team and we headed to Danube river for a swim. Was quite magical floating there in fresh water in between two swans (literally). It was rain and thunder. Even the weather Gods were still crying their tears after what hit them in Stadthalle.  
 
It's just so fucking beautiful what happens on this tour. I have never seen anything like it, not even close. The show goes by so fast, it’s more than two hours and the emotions run from jumping happiness to heaviest struggle to get my voice out of my throat because it feels like I’m dying under emotions. I didn’t know it can feel that beautiful. There are so many lyrics on that show that have gotten a totally new depth level. Last night singing the second verse of Hollywood Hills, I felt flames or something going through my body so strong I thought I’d fall. It was so amazingly beautiful and strong. I take a part of you with me now and you won’t get it back. And a part of me will stay here. You can keep it forever dear. Until the end of time <3
 
Thank you Austria. Thank you so much. I will miss you and your cities and mountains so much, we all will. And I will come back. I had a walk today for a schnitzel at restaurant Meissl & Schadn (because that’s the place to eat) and during the walk I remembered again how amazing the city of Vienna is. It’s so beautiful and colorful. Everyone’s so active and moving and still there’s no feeling of rush. I could really live there. I wasn’t a big fan of the tour schedule in the beginning as the dates are so separated, but now I have realized it’s gonna be summer and warm everywhere until the end of the tour and I will, for the first time ever, have time to really enjoy all the cities everywhere. There’s just no rush. It feels amazing smelling the street corners everywhere the night before the show and also after. A part of me will stay in every city after this thing is over. And I will take a part of the cities with me. And I’ll take damn good care of those pieces deep in my heart. 
 
Oh, and the schnitzel at Meissl & Schadn… Just go give it a shot.
 
This Flight from Vienna to Helsinki is pretty much full of folks from the show last night. Some more hungover, some less, most of them wearing some Sunrise Avenue gear and all feeling the afterglow in their hearts. Everyone came to talk to me at the airport. I just love it so much. Actually I miss that. In the good old autograph times people used to talk to me much more. So I wanna make one thing clear. Even though I don’t take selfies or any kind of pictures any more, I really love meeting people. Talking to you and hearing your thoughts about anything is so nice. The no-selfies thing has been the best decision ever and I understand most people in the world don’t see why, but I just felt like a monkey in a zoo and it got too much. And it messed up my head. It’s flattering at the same time of course, but at some point you start feeling like a circus monkey. On stage it’s different, there it’s part of the game and I even love to see all the photos and videos you take and post online. Seems like we have some pretty good photographers at every show.
 
But even though I haven’t taken selfies for a few years now, I LOVE meeting people and talking to people. I also like giving autographs and even spending longer times with strangers. If they don’t have a camera pointing at my face. That is the part of the plastic world that is sometimes getting just a bit too far if you ask me. But when we face each other as human beings and we actually hear each other and we’re really there, that’s when we can be ourselves and feel safe. I also admit that if I’d be with Barak Obama or Leon Draisaitl, I’d have the thought in my head “Damn this’ll look cool on my Instagram page” but I will at least try not to ask. Barak, fancy a beer with me if I leave my phone at home?
 
Two reasons writing the lines above. First, thank you for understanding and respecting my boundaries. I know it feels strange. You could say to me that all that comes with the job. It actually doesn’t. Making music doesn’t mean you need to let people come to your skin. And I know it must feel bad when you ask someone for a picture and the answer is “no.” I’ve been turned down many times in my life and I know how it feels. But if someone asks if they can have or get something, they must accept both answers. This goes to selfies, but also for touching others or anything. It’s your life, body, space and your decisions. 
 
The second reason for writing about this is, please don’t ever hesitate talking to me. I don’t want to live alone in a Samu-Haber-Sunrise-Avenue-Voice-Of whet ever bubble. I love talking to you and getting together with you. You sometimes say words that are so wise that they stop my moment in a very good way and they make me think. Like these two girls (One from Austria and one from Germany) in this plane today who I have seen at many shows, but they also come to the Hockey games in Helsinki sometimes. They are very cool and they understand everything I write above. Once the night was cold after a ice hockey game this winter and I gave them a ride to the city from the hockey arena. I feel safe with them. Just like most of you actually <3
 
And all the above goes to you too. You have the full right to set boundaries on how you’re being treated and what is your own space, for example. But sometimes people don’t know your limits if you don’t tell them. This is a lesson I have learnt the hard way and it took years to realize and to accept it in between all the beautiful craziness. But I’m glad I know now. And you should too. If someone doesn’t accept or respect your limits or feelings about what comes to you and who you truly are, let them leave. They were not meant to be in your life. You should be you, free and your way. As long as you respect others and don’t harm anyone around you.
 
I know there are people who don’t like to read these words. But these throughts are all true and pure, I stand behind them a 100%. “Tell the truth and take responsibility.” – Jordan Peterson. Well said. 
 
Years ago I saw a picture of a young girl who held a sign saying “I wanna learn to play guitar, can I have your guitar pick?” There has been many signs like this in the crowd these years, but for some reason I remembered this one. Before the show we met her and the other Austrian fan club folks and she reminded me of this incident many years ago. As they all left the meet & Greet before the show and I walked to my backstage, I decided to give her my guitar after the show if I only find her in the crowd. And I did.
 
Dear Sarah. What you said and how you said it through your tears at backstage right after the show, you touched me very deep and I’ll never forget that moment. Your words and everything you said was so true, so wise and so full of love. If you decide to continue playing music and you end up someday in a place in the industry where someone is treating you bad, let me know. You are so beautiful and precious and you should be treated so too. You gave me very much that evening and I know the guitar is in perfect hands now. Play it well and keep going with music as long as it feels it’s right for you. 
 
Next step Pohjanmaa. So now we got a long break with the boys and the next show is on July 1st at Provinssi Rock in Seinäjoki, Finland. It’s our drummer Sami’s birthplace and the place where he grew up. As the Final tour was announced a couple years ago, there were tens of festival offers from all over Europe on the table. As the farewell tour was already long with 18 shows, I didn’t want to double it and to book everything that was offered. Except this one. It’s so cool that Sami also gets a chance to say proper goodbye in his original hometown. His face is so priceless happy when you drive to that area (Pohjanmaa) with him and I know what this place means to him. We played that festival once before in 2009. Then I hit my own face with my guitar right after probably the crappiest Sunrise show ever. So that’s another reason to go back and to beat the Provinssi Rock monster with full power. It’s the only festival we will play now and therefore it’ll be the last festival show of Sunrise Avenue. 
 
We’re landing now and I’ll soon jump in a taxi and head straight to my motorbike and ride somewhere for a swim. I try to find a peaceful spot where I can be alone and to rememorize all the love I and we received on this magnificent trip. The water is still so lovely cold.
 
After this tour is over and after we have done what we have done together with you, this world will be a better place. If a butterfly can effect the weather on the other side of the planet by opening its wings, imagine what can happen as we, thousands of souls together, shout for love and thankfulness every night. 
 
If only I could send this feeling from my heart to everyone in the world right now.
 
Still Yours, 
 
Samu